Red nails, blue sky, black sand.
November 9th 2011
Things I like right now
1) My new turquoise shoes
2) Hanging my clothes according to the colours of the Chakra system (red, orange, yellow, green/pink, blue, violet, white). I put brown or golden toned garments where orange or yellow would be.
3) My cardigans. I really like my cardigans a lot. I now have a red one, so now I’m all giddy with cardigan choices. I'm a cardigan slut.
4) Groomed nails. I had my toenails and fingernails done in red last week. I like the clash of the red against the turquoise of my new shoes. I am not a pedicure/manicure regular, but a little luxury can go a long way.
5) The bed time hypnosis track I’ve been listening to. The hypnotherapist I went to gave it to me, and it’s very soothing, but also quite sexy. The man has an English accent and says things very slowly, such as
“You are going deeper and it feels good ... and the deeper you go, the better you feel.” Auditory porn.
6) Sleeping in the car. I realise this sounds a bit homeless, but when you’re at work and you have a break, nothing beats putting down the seat and having a snooze. I seem to fall straight into an unconscious slumber, and my neck feels a lot better afterwards.
Things that freak me out a little bit
1)The photography shop in New Lynn. There’s a ball photo that really disturbs me. It’s of this girl, she’s young and probably beautiful, but so fragile that it actually feels painful. It isn’t a ‘gosh what a lovely girl’ feeling, it’s more like ‘heading for a snapped wrist from her boyfriend’ vibe. He could get her a ‘victim’ tattoo.
2) The pretend dog gazing from inside someone’s ranch slider door in South Auckland. I went for a walk today (one of my classes couldn’t make it) and this arrested me. I stared at the fake dog looking out at me for far too long. I knew it was fake, but I was trying to imagine what the person was thinking when they bought it. It was a concrete Jack Russel. I imagine an old man or lady living there, saying “well since Toby died I’ve been so lonely. Now that I have Tim Tim I feel so much better. He looks out the window at the world going by, just the way Toby did. Such a comfort. I do forget sometimes, that Tim Tim is made of concrete, and oh, when I pat him it gives me such a terrible fright.”
She/he nibbles a scone and then pours herself some more tea.
Day 19 of Forgiveness
I forgive myself . I let others be.
Other notes: I do miss D. It feels sad and odd. Seems strange to not tell him funny little things that I think or feel, and he did such a good old man impression!
God I'm hungry. Time to get some shitty coffee and something sweet.
x
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